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Sister Wives Recap: The Compound is Complete

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Ca23ptureShe’s your kid!  No, she’s YOURS!Howdy, Trashmii!  Let’s get right to our exciting ep, shall we? We open with the usual recap of prior action, during which the phrase “in by Christmas” is uttered for the 10,326,651 time.  Then we go to footage of Christine moving into her new home, while Kody tells us he’s close to achieving his dream.  I thought he already had: “look like a surfer dude and drive around in a sports car while doing absolutely no work at all, and still getting sex from 4 (or more) women” – isn’t that Kody’s dream?  Or, for that matter, every man’s dream? Christine is carrying a mattress, and Kody tells her it’s what he was waiting for.  OMG is this Playboy After Dark?  Since last week, this show has become alarmingly mattress-centric.  Told you he was going to christen each new home! I’ll take that, honey.  After all, it’s the most important piece of furniture in the house!Over to Janelle, who as you’d expect has a much calmer, organized move.  Oh hey, Robyn’s moving too. Kody tells us he’s waiting for a Christmas miracle.  You know what would be a Christmas miracle to me?  That you’d get a steady, full-time job and live within your means!   Meri says yet again they don’t have an answer on when they get the home, and Kody dramatically proclaims there’s a possibility they could lose the home.  No, there’s not.  There is no way anyone who wasn’t a Brown would ever want to buy that fourth home, as least not with Browns in the other three. 2 bitchy peas in a pod.Kody goes on to say they’re putting off Christmas to January 2 to have extra time for Meri to get in her home.  You do realize, Kody, that Christmas is a fixed date every year?  Does that mean we can just arbitrarily change other fixed dates?  For a start, I for one would like to change Tax Day from April 15 to February 29. Kody bursts into Christine’s new home shouting”honey, I’m home”.  Try that with Oscar Pistorius and see how far you get! The most horrifying thing any woman could hear:  Kody’s home.Christine then shares they still have to move the mattresses – again with the mattress talk!  Christine goes on to say they should establish the Brown Moving Company as one of their businesses.  Well, it’d pull in way more than MSWC, that’s for sure. In interview, Kody waxes nostalgic as he remarks now “desperate” they felt when they moved to Vegas.  When the kids started adjusting “there was hope”, he says, when they established a business “there was hope”, and then they made offers on the homes “against all common sense” – and now they’re moving in.  Meri does her best Grumpy Cat imitation at this.  I just want to point out that everything Kody and this bunch do is “against all common sense”. Pages: 1 23456

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