Another week with the Real Housewives of New Jersey, and suspiciously everyone is still getting along. The Guidices arrive at the Gorgas for a playdate and sweet little Antonia is immediately sucked over to the dark side. It takes Milania approximately three seconds to convince Antonia to go hang out in the recording studio basement. But it’s dark, frets Melissa. Well, that’s why we’re calling it the dark side. I can’t wait ’til I’m old enough for a g-string. Ter tells Mel that she is debuting a new hair care line and when she asked her Twitter followers what she should name it, they all said “Milania”. Furthermore, this is all part of her “empire” – yes, empire – and she thinks it’s nice that Melissa is being supportive. Melissa stuffs her face so she can’t comment as Ter prattles on about being a mogul, and tries not to make faces like this. Keep trying. Oh, but then it’s Mel’s turn. She’s got a mock up of her book cover, which I must say is quite reminiscent of Ter’s book covers. Sorry - empire of book covers. Meanwhile, Ter tries not to make faces like this. Bitch. I mean – oh, screw it. Bitch. Mel does ask Ter’s advice on picking book covers, but at the same time freaks out that “I can tell by her body language that she’s judging”. Get a grip. She also says that it’s very suspicious that just now when announces that she has a book about marriage coming out, here come the cheating rumors. She doesn’t totally trust that Ter wasn’t behind it. Teresa, for her part, tells her to just brush it off. Like I do wit’ bankruptcy. Oh, it’s fraud now? See, I just brush it off, I don’t even know. Post-op, Jacquee is back in town. She’s excited to see her boys and they are excited to see her too. Chris Laurita being a nice dad to Baby Nick, tickling him why the baby giggles, and forcing poor little CJ into child labor. Doesn’t take more than 4th grade math to tell you black water makes you broke. Jacquee arrives home and it’s a very sweet reunion. Baby Nick is thrilled to see her, and snuggles up like the cutest little bunny in old man pajamas. I’m happy for them. Then it’s off to grocery shopping with the Wakiles. They shop around and Lebanese Dilbert gets a text from Midge who wants to go to a cigar bar. Dilbert thinks that’s code for “strip club”. Then he storms the bakery counter at the market and tries to get his wife in at the supermarket. Kat tells us that the cannoli biz is going well. She’s already been on the shopping channel twice. She’s out to change the way the world looks at cannoli. Aim high, I always say. Then it’s off to the cigar bar, which to Dilbert’s disappointment is actually a cigar bar. They chat about the wives. Chris Laurita gives […]
Another week with the Real Housewives of New Jersey, and suspiciously everyone is still getting along. The Guidices arrive at the Gorgas for a playdate and sweet little Antonia is immediately sucked over to the dark side. It takes Milania approximately three seconds to convince Antonia to go hang out in the recording studio basement. But it’s dark, frets Melissa. Well, that’s why we’re calling it the dark side. I can’t wait ’til I’m old enough for a g-string. Ter tells Mel that she is debuting a new hair care line and when she asked her Twitter followers what she should name it, they all said “Milania”. Furthermore, this is all part of her “empire” – yes, empire – and she thinks it’s nice that Melissa is being supportive. Melissa stuffs her face so she can’t comment as Ter prattles on about being a mogul, and tries not to make faces like this. Keep trying. Oh, but then it’s Mel’s turn. She’s got a mock up of her book cover, which I must say is quite reminiscent of Ter’s book covers. Sorry - empire of book covers. Meanwhile, Ter tries not to make faces like this. Bitch. I mean – oh, screw it. Bitch. Mel does ask Ter’s advice on picking book covers, but at the same time freaks out that “I can tell by her body language that she’s judging”. Get a grip. She also says that it’s very suspicious that just now when announces that she has a book about marriage coming out, here come the cheating rumors. She doesn’t totally trust that Ter wasn’t behind it. Teresa, for her part, tells her to just brush it off. Like I do wit’ bankruptcy. Oh, it’s fraud now? See, I just brush it off, I don’t even know. Post-op, Jacquee is back in town. She’s excited to see her boys and they are excited to see her too. Chris Laurita being a nice dad to Baby Nick, tickling him why the baby giggles, and forcing poor little CJ into child labor. Doesn’t take more than 4th grade math to tell you black water makes you broke. Jacquee arrives home and it’s a very sweet reunion. Baby Nick is thrilled to see her, and snuggles up like the cutest little bunny in old man pajamas. I’m happy for them. Then it’s off to grocery shopping with the Wakiles. They shop around and Lebanese Dilbert gets a text from Midge who wants to go to a cigar bar. Dilbert thinks that’s code for “strip club”. Then he storms the bakery counter at the market and tries to get his wife in at the supermarket. Kat tells us that the cannoli biz is going well. She’s already been on the shopping channel twice. She’s out to change the way the world looks at cannoli. Aim high, I always say. Then it’s off to the cigar bar, which to Dilbert’s disappointment is actually a cigar bar. They chat about the wives. Chris Laurita gives […]