Hey guys,
Jewpacabra here filling in for the Awesome-sauce CMint!!!
First of all! Happy post Turkey Day. I hope you all got full of delicious food and pie.
I have finally awaken from my post Big Brother recapping coma (that show sucked all the energy out of me) and am happy to be back recapping one of my absolute favorite shows on TV. I basically binge watched all the episodes I missed so I would be ready for this recap. LOL. So I’m real tired of some of these characters (cough CrazyFish).
I’ll be honest though that there are a few recent seasons I have missed (fucking pharmacy school ruined my life for a while) so some of these people I have no clue who they are still. Aka I have no qualms ripping them to shreds. But all the old school players are all my favorites (minus Savage and that beanie……).
I’m convinced CBS is making this year the year of the douchey bitch beanie wearers
Example 1:
Example 2: At least Savage doesn’t paint on foundation
So this week we got a 2 hour episode (kill me). Lord can only hope a producer plants a chicken in camp for Kimmi to flip a shit over. *silently prays to the Survivor Gods*. Lets jump right into this bitch.
So last time the Ghost of Wiggles got the boot. I say ghost because I’m pretty sure she’d have to be dead to account for the amount of screen time they gave her. She just didn’t show up at all
After the recap, we get the “fallout” of the last vote, which basically means that absolutely no one cared all that much she is gone. Tasha is fairly upset, but is gonna give them a pass for some reason. Sounds like a pretty terrible idea. Pretty Boy Joe, is still angry and somehow Jeremy and Crazy Fish push the blame on the Triad of Bitchface (Ciera, Crabby, and Kelly). Everyone is like “yeah, sure why not”. How is no one onto Jeremy’s BS?????
Our Lady of Tituba realness only gives people one chance
We awake to Orkun Day 25 and it is raining again, so all of the contestidiots look miserable. Ut Oh, Ciera is getting the first interview of the main episode. Since she hasn’t really been on this season, I can only assume that means she is going home.
I’m totally safe right?
The Survivors are all worried because they are stuck in the shelter together and not being able to strategize. But mostly they are trapped wtih Captain Crazy
Aka Captian Obvious. Omg thanks Crabi! I had no idea
Keith attempts to interview about something but all I hear is
DURRRRRRR
God he annoys me. In other news, CrazyFish’s feet are revolting
WTF is happening???
So we get right into today’s challenge and Jeff (who somehow seems to not have aged at all in the 15 + years of doing this) does his usual parade of stupid questions. I’m bored. What’s the challenge?
The prize this week is a trip to a warm bungalow or something of that nature where they can get a warm shower, blankets, food etc
Spencer just creamed himself
So the challenge is a 5 vs 5 game of full contact basketball from Survivor Tocantines. The teams shake out as follows
Team Yeah We Got the Black Guy: Other Kelly, Kimmi, CrazyFish, Jeremy, Durrrrrr
Team Spencer and the 4 Pretty Ladies: Spencer, Tasha, Crabi (living up to her name), Ciera, Pretty Girl Joe
Round 1: 2 men and 1 woman
Joe, Spencer, Ciera vs CrazyFish, Other Kelly, Jeremy
Point goes to the Team with the Black Guy…
Holy fuck he is jacked
Oh this is for Joe fans, you’re welcome
Round 2: Kimmi, Other Kelly, Durr vs Joe, Crabi and Tasha
Joe gets a little grabby
But he ultimately scores a point
Round 3: Jeremy, Kimmi, CrazyFish vs Joe, Ciera and Nosferatu… oh wait I mean Spencer
Allrighty I’m bored with this challenge, there is a decent girl fight at the end but team Spencer and the Pretty Ladies win
Who needs a black guy to win at basketball? Not us
Once again we get another random Ciera interview about how this is a great strategy opportunity, basically the editors have secured her elimination…
On the reward the survivors celebrate with food and such, and get to watch some crazy Cambodians doing awesome things
So cool!
Ciera has an emotional breakdown when she sees some kids but quickly goes into game mode because she is a stone cold bitch and I LOVE IT. Her first season was epic when she demanded everyone choose rocks. Spencer and the Survivorettes all agree they should blindside CrazyFish to get rid of his advantage before returning to camp.