When we last left our Shah’s the wedding to the century had just taken place in a private room in a moderately priced restaurant. Yes, Adam and Reza tied the night in their flash mob wedding and for just a moment all seemed right with the world, well minus Asa’s homemade turban that thing was never going to be right. Reza and Adam fade into the night in a limo that says Mr+Mr, that was a very presumptuous limo reservation.
The crew is excited that Reza and Adam are officially hitched because it leaves MJ more time to be annoyed with Mike for a variety of reasons. As the group disbands from the restaurant MJ announces that the Gremlin is back on his phone. The Gremlin is code for Mike and I will give some props to MJ for coming up with a somewhat unique nickname for Mike, but really on a show where one of the cast members says her passions is periscope why do we have such an issue with Mike reading old Air BNB reviews of the guest house Reza is making them stay in, jk you know he is sending snap chat to hoes, but really who cares? MJ explains that she feels personally hurt over the potential dissolution of Mike and Jessica’s marriage and I feel personally hurt by that montage I had to watch of her putting a banana in her mouth while Reza took photos but I’m not screaming gremlin at her, at least not to her face. Anyway, Tommy tells MJ she needs to stop it with this Mike stuff and in his interview which god bless the person who had to write him questions for that exclusive sit down he tells us that he thinks Mike’s marriage ending scares MJ because she worries that her relationship won’t last and that she has deep seeded issues back to her parent’s divorce. I want to redact my statement about the poor interviewer who had to sit through this session because that might be the most sane thing that a Bravolebrity has ever said.
As the group rides home there is a lot of confusion over uber and there is no way that anyone of them ever had a good uber rating, and MJ opening her car door while driving certainly wasn’t going to help. Mike insists on taking an uber back to the party house alone which in hindsight bad idea because he couldn’t split the fare. Also on a financially related note, for a group that occasionally is concerned about cash flow how have they never heard of UberX?
Reza and Adam wake up a newly married couple back at their house which I assumed was just a romantic night for two, but Jefferson is waking up in a twin bed next door in his Urban Outfitters tank top. Reza has set up a brunch over at the party house to solidify that he won’t get his deposit back on the rental. Again, this seems like a VERY presumptuous brunch but ok. Over at the party house the crew is waking up and MJ is on a tear, her anger at Mike and his interest in reading the Wiki page for Palm Springs on his phone and her disgust over the current state of the rental house sends her over the edge. I will admit there were a disturbing amount of blue Doritos in that house, but MJ goes nuts cleaning, she tracks down a vacuum she is washing out blenders, all to the sweet sounds of GG silent periscoping and Mike counting how many Uber black cars are in a 5 mile radius.
Everyone assembles for brunch and Reza’s cousin Ali is dressed in a shirt that he must have picked up from the donate cannot sell pile at the Estate Sale store. It looks like someone ripped wallpaper off of someone’s circa 1960 house in Palm Spring and haphazardly turned it into a shirt. Thankfully Reza notices this as well and comments that it looks like he stole it from MJ, I can always count on ya Rez. The brunch looks delicious and as the crew sits down to eat MJ insists Tommy sit with the guys in which case he is stuck sitting with Ali and Jefferson, topics probably include, sleeping in twin beds and creative ways to rid your clothing of wallpaper glue, good times for Tommy. MJ takes this opportunity to remind everyone why she is mad at Mike, and in this moment I officially saw MJ turn full on Vida, all that was missing was a penchant for extended cruising. Tommy finally explains to MJ that she needs to stop this is not her weekend, just like two weeks ago it wasn’t her cat themed retirement party, she needs to stop being selfish and let others enjoy their time. Mike and MJ go outside and seem to almost make up, MJ had her sunglasses on and was probably more interested in vacuuming to really give it the college try, but they seem ok, for now.