Hi Trashies!
Hopefully you’ll be well rested and happy after New Year, or frazzled and hungover – depends whether you have a family or not. The cast of Masterchef Junior didn’t tragically die over Christmas, so that’s one indignant letter of complaint I need to write to Santa.
I did get time to myself to binge watch Penny Dreadful S1, the Flash S1, Plebs S1 and S2 and a whole bunch of films I hasn’t seen yet like Guardians of The Galaxy, which is nothing like the Guardians of the Galaxy I read in the 80s and 90s but was ok even so. Then I got so bored Ive started watching the X-Files from the start again. I also saw Derren Brown’s latest show in London which was excellent. So bear with me if it takes a while to remember who the kiddies all are. There’s two episodes to wade through so buckle up.
There’s a brief mid-season recap, for people like me who are terminally stupid and remember almost nothing of a show they watched only three weeks ago.
Tonight is an egg challenge, followed much later by some tag team switching tomfoolery. Eliminations might even start getting fraught as we are down to the top 10 now.
So they’re cooking Alligators, is my guess
Only four minis are competing in the next challenge. They pick an egg, crack it on TG’s head and if it has red or blue in it that’s their team. So the other six don’t get a chance to win at all? Whoa!
Blue is Amaya, Kya.
Red is Zac, Kamilly.
Props to TG for having nine or ten eggs cracked on his head.
So the four of them now have to make as many deviled eggs as they can. Deviled (or Devilled depending on the area) are pleasant enough but rarely spicy enough for me to want to make them myself. Basically I’ll eat yours if you brought any, but I won’t be bringing them to the picnic myself.
If you haven’t met them before they are just boiled eggs with the yolk hollowed out, mashed up with mustard or mayonnaise and put back in and paprika chucked on top. Plus some other spices depending on the local recipe or cooks taste.
One final twist, TG and Gordy are competing too. Gordy takes the dubious decision to engage in some trashtalk with Kya.
ch’yar ul’nyar shaggornyth. Your soul is mine Ramsay.
Just in case anyone has a cow over me putting occult words into the mouth of a child, I haven’t, they’re entirely made up and not occult at all. And she’s clearly a hellspawn so I didn’t start it.
They have twelve minutes, but Team pro chef are only getting half the time to cook. The winners get to skip the next challenge, but if Gordy wins they both cook. Hmm. Can anyone say ‘Time filler’? On average it takes someone who is ‘amateur’ ten times as long to complete a task as a professional, down to three times as long for an ‘experienced amateur’. So time is on Gordy and TG’s side. Basically you will never beat people who practiced these skills for the last twenty five years, unless they deliberately lose it. Making a mockery of the whole thing even more, as six aren’t getting the chance of a pass from the next elimination challenge.
Eggsalent!
There are some things you just have to do. TG and Gordy fail miserably and Red team (Zac and Kamilly) don’t cook next challenge.
There’s two going home, so the previous challenge and how it was set up was manifestly unfair. As Addison is lined up to win, its probably not worth bleating on about this too much, they’re really just establishing the order in which the others lose.
In this round the sprogs are doing their signature dish. At their age my signature dish was beans on toast. Or a double Whopper with cheese.
Avery gets a hard time off TG for misspelling some bits in her cook book. Kaitlynn is sailing right into danger by making Black Forest cupcakes, but using raspberry instead of Cherry – on the grounds that raspberry goes better with black chocolate. That’s a matter of taste, but Black Forest gateaux has Kirsch (cherry liqueur) running through it, so she’ll be missing a component – which Gordy then confirms. Also no cream, just vanilla buttercream. That is, as Gordy says, just a chocolate sponge with buttercream on it and raspberry sauce – unless she has something up her sleeves (she doesn’t). It’s going to have be a chocolate sponge that gets you drunk, drives you home safely and then deposits three thousand quid into your bank account as a thank you gift for her to stay.