Welcome back K-fans. Not much happens in this episode, but here goes anyway. I’ve the got vodka handy.
Kris brings four boxes of Krispy Kremes to Kylie at her new house. They give one box to the workers doing Kylie’s swimming pool.
Of course the “K” family would endorse “K”rispy “K”remes!
I will gladly feed the little people
Kris and Kim tell Kourtney about what happened with Scott and how distraught he was (as seen in last week’s episode). Kourtney asks why they didn’t call 911. (Kourtney is the sensible one?) Kim reports that she got a text that he was out partying right after that incident. Unfazed, Kourtney says you always call the police because you either save someone’s life or he’s bluffing and you just waste your own time.
C’mon Kim. How do you eat with those big lips?
Khloe is writing a book (Strong Looks Better Naked), which is consuming a lot of her time. It’s about being strong in mind, body, and soul. She enjoys writing but she is so overwhelmed with other stuff that it is causing a lot of stress. The book has a release date that has been over-publicized and she cannot slack. Kim distracts her (Kim is looking HUGE by the way) trying to get Khloe to go have fun with her.
Kris takes Kylie to an upscale home furnishing place, Toto, to get some home furnishings for Kylie’s new house. (Didn’t she already move in a couple of episodes ago?) Kris asks if she will be cleaning her toilets herself. They look at a fancy toilet that self-cleans your “personal space.” Kris says it’s better than going to the gynecologist.
I want a toilet that has a dildo in it, too!
Kris is having a photo shoot/interview at her house for Evening Standard Magazine in London. Kim struggles (waddles) up the stairs. Kim is selling all her equipment because she wants grey instead of black. Kris had once asked to buy it from her, but Kim didn’t want to break it up; now she’s selling it all and wondering why Kris isn’t buying it. Then they fight about some marble that Kris took that Kim had ordered – Kim is charging Kris for the marble. Kim has to have all the marble in her house match and now there’s not enough – not in the whole world. It’s sold out. Kris is upset about the total lack of communication within the whole family.
Huffing and Puffing. “Where’s the elevator?”
I must have everything match
Khloe is driving with Malika in the car, and showing road rage. She complains that Kris flaked on her today and she’s pissed off. Khloe is feeling pressure with appearances, Dash stuff, writing the book, etc., and Kris keeps booking her on things – adding to the stress. Malika says Khloe and Kris need to talk it out.
Who’s watching the road?
Kourtney and Penelope are over at Kylie’s – they get a tour of the house. Kourtney immediately starts trying to rearrange furniture and tells Kylie what she should be doing. Kourtney offers to throw a housewarming party. Kylie says no – she wants to do things her own way. Kris comes in and there is more pressure about the party. Kylie repeats that she wants to do it herself.
Khloe is at a Redbook cover photo shoot. Kris is supposed to be there but is late. Khloe is mad because Kris overbooked her and she has no time to herself. Khloe tells her mom she can’t keep up working at this pace – she asks Kris to cancel something. They fight. Kris says Khloe is magnifying the problem because she’s stressed and overworked (which is what Khloe is trying to tell her – duh.) Kris tells Khloe to go to her happy place – Mary Poppins or whatever makes her smile, and eat some food. (Sure, tell someone who struggles with weight issues to go eat for comfort!)
Token ASS shot
Kris tells Khloe and Kim she wants to set up a meeting with a communication professional to discuss why the girls are always on their phone. Kourtney had suggested her friend Erica – a friend from college – who deals with these kinds of issues. Erica is a communication expert. Kim says it’s the dumbest idea ever. Khloe says she cannot have one more thing on her list to do.
Always.On.Their.Phones
Kourtney is still trying to get Kylie to agree to a housewarming. She keeps making suggestions. She says it will be The Ultimate Housewarming Party. Kourtney says she’s living her life through Kylie. Kylie wants simplicity and to do it her way – how many times does she have to keep saying that? Kourtney says her way is the best way. But Kylie says she has to learn how to do it. Kylie complains to Cailyn about the family trying to interfere and run things. (What’s new about that?) Caitlyn tells her she should do exactly what she wants. Kylie decides to take the advice.
I am the best party planner
Somebody teach this girl how to properly wear seat belts. Even in a Rolls.
Khloe and Kim and Kourtney are complaining about how annoying Kris is. Kim says that she’s pissed that Kris is wearing her clothes and copying her style. Erica, Kourtney’s communication expert friend, shows up for the big communication session, but Kris is a no-show – she’s in Paris. She forgot to communicate with herself that she had this appointment with the girls on communication.
Kim stops to eat, naturally
First exercise: telling each other one thing that they appreciate about the other one. Khloe appreciates Kim’s ability to be so honest. She appreciates Kourtney’s strength as a mother and how she can hold everything together. Kourtney appreciates Kim’s ability to do it all. She appreciates Khloe how she has energy and lives in the moment, present in whatever situation she’s at, and always in a good mood (except lately.). Kourtney admits Khloe is stressed out lately because she’s a workaholic. (Guess Kim doesn’t appreciate anything about Khloe and Kourtney – it is not shown if she does.)
Kim eating
and eating
Kim is over at Khloe’s – eating those cookies that no one ever eats that are in big jars on the counter – she asks how the book is coming along. Khloe complains about how stressful it is – she has to keep reading all the re-writes. Kim tells her to “live the book” – about mind, body and soul. She tells Khloe she needs to focus.
and eating
and eating
Kim is over at Kourtney’s and they are complaining again about Kris and how she didn’t show up at their communications meeting and now they have to explain what they did at the meeting to her. (By the way, Kim is wearing the same outfit in almost every single shot in this episode. Everyone else has different clothes on.) Kim says they need to teach Kris a lesson. They are going to prank her – there are consequences for her missing the communication sessions.
Kim waiting for the food to show up
Kylie’s housewarming party – it turns out to be just for the family – she planned it and wants to prove that she can be a good hostess. The flowers are from Tyga – he gives her flowers every day. The family all heap compliments on how good her house looks and how nice the party is. Kourtney realizes that Kylie doesn’t need her help anymore and she will back off now. Then Khloe and Kourtney get in a sour cream and guacamole food fight and make a mess in Kylie’s new house. Very weird.
The hostess setting the table
This is bizarre
Sporting that hoodie look again
Tyga sends flowers every day
Kylie and Kourtney come to Khloe’s house with champagne – congratulations for finishing her book. Khloe says she feels positive now that the book is done – all her negative energy has left.
Kourtney and Kim are making “pies” filled with whipped cream and toppings so they can use them to prank Kris. Khloe is sick (guess the “negative energy” returned). They tell Kris that she needs to learn to communicate with her children. She has a choice: Sit and have the girls throw and try to hit the target (does she not recognize a dunk tank?) or option B which is a surprise. Kris says she will do one of each. They ask her when is Kim’s due date. She gets it wrong. Dunk. What is North’s middle name? South? Wrong. She gets a pie in the face. How long has Dash been open? Six years? Wrong. Another pie in the face. The girls run off and Kris is left crying with pie in her face.
Next episode: a surprise pregnant birthday party for Kim – everyone is dressed as being pregnant. It is Kris’s birthday also – the girls are recording a song for her. Scott is going to rehab (again.)
Well, K-fans, what did you think? Nothing much happened in this episode and things seem way out of sequence. Will Kim ever stop eating? Will Khloe ever be naked and strong? Will Kylie schedule all her gynecological exams in her bathroom? Sound off in the comments below. Meanwhile:
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