Will someone tell me how long I have to pretend I still care?Howdy, Trashmii! Welcome to this week’s ep, “A Wife Decides”. As you’ll see later, that’s actually a somewhat misleading title – it’s more accurately “A Wife Discarded”. Let’s get right to it! After the usual rehash of prior “action”, Kody tells us life is back to normal now, although the wives have to build an understanding of “boundaries and nuances”. I imagine those are along the lines of “if this house is a-rockin’, don’t come a-knockin’. In interview, Kody points out the bleeding obvious fact that each wife is an “independent individual”, and muses on how they can create “unity from diversity”. Ask the Balkan States. They’ve done a superb job! Kody finishes with one of his patented banal quotes: “the challenge is the opportunity”. Opportunity to fail, yes. Let’s check in with each wife. Meri tells us Mariah loves being in her new home, and Little Miss Travis Bickle now says waiting that extra week to move was “not that big a deal”. Wow, psycho and forgetful. What a combo! Say whatever you want, Travis, just don’t kill us afterwards.Meri also tells us that she loves hearing kids in her loft. What, does she have a sweatshop up there so they can make that junky jewelry? Why, look who bought a new tube of mascara!Over to Christine, who says it’s “incredible” living there. Her kids have built some kind of tent city in her “backyard” (bare dirt, just like all of them), and Christine fake-complains about her yard being ruined. The younger kids say there aren’t enough kids for 4 houses. We know! That’s why it’s such a waste that your parents couldn’t have gotten just one large-ish house. Now go and tell them they just p-ssed away the money for your college educations! After calling a couple of her kids and getting no response, Janelle observes that kids disappear in her home. Actually, in every home, Janelle. We finish with Robyn, who’s unpacking a fire pit, and tells us Kody is going to burn the duffel bag he’s been carrying from house to house. Robyn tells us The Bag is a “visual stimulation of a memory”. So’s porn, for that matter. We see a montage of Kody using The Bag, while Christine says it was like Kody “coming over for a sleepover”. You do know it will continue to be that way, right? Janelle says she hasn’t thought much about The Bag, and Kody says she loved seeing him packing it since that meant Janelle would have her place to herself again. I repeat: you do know it will continue to be that way, right? Remember this bag for later.Just occurred to me – why didn’t they put The Bag in the time capsule as a “visual stimulation of a memory” of their wilderness years? Also, is Kody now supposed to run “home” (and where is “home”?) during each rotation, every time he needs to get […]
Will someone tell me how long I have to pretend I still care?Howdy, Trashmii! Welcome to this week’s ep, “A Wife Decides”. As you’ll see later, that’s actually a somewhat misleading title – it’s more accurately “A Wife Discarded”. Let’s get right to it! After the usual rehash of prior “action”, Kody tells us life is back to normal now, although the wives have to build an understanding of “boundaries and nuances”. I imagine those are along the lines of “if this house is a-rockin’, don’t come a-knockin’. In interview, Kody points out the bleeding obvious fact that each wife is an “independent individual”, and muses on how they can create “unity from diversity”. Ask the Balkan States. They’ve done a superb job! Kody finishes with one of his patented banal quotes: “the challenge is the opportunity”. Opportunity to fail, yes. Let’s check in with each wife. Meri tells us Mariah loves being in her new home, and Little Miss Travis Bickle now says waiting that extra week to move was “not that big a deal”. Wow, psycho and forgetful. What a combo! Say whatever you want, Travis, just don’t kill us afterwards.Meri also tells us that she loves hearing kids in her loft. What, does she have a sweatshop up there so they can make that junky jewelry? Why, look who bought a new tube of mascara!Over to Christine, who says it’s “incredible” living there. Her kids have built some kind of tent city in her “backyard” (bare dirt, just like all of them), and Christine fake-complains about her yard being ruined. The younger kids say there aren’t enough kids for 4 houses. We know! That’s why it’s such a waste that your parents couldn’t have gotten just one large-ish house. Now go and tell them they just p-ssed away the money for your college educations! After calling a couple of her kids and getting no response, Janelle observes that kids disappear in her home. Actually, in every home, Janelle. We finish with Robyn, who’s unpacking a fire pit, and tells us Kody is going to burn the duffel bag he’s been carrying from house to house. Robyn tells us The Bag is a “visual stimulation of a memory”. So’s porn, for that matter. We see a montage of Kody using The Bag, while Christine says it was like Kody “coming over for a sleepover”. You do know it will continue to be that way, right? Janelle says she hasn’t thought much about The Bag, and Kody says she loved seeing him packing it since that meant Janelle would have her place to herself again. I repeat: you do know it will continue to be that way, right? Remember this bag for later.Just occurred to me – why didn’t they put The Bag in the time capsule as a “visual stimulation of a memory” of their wilderness years? Also, is Kody now supposed to run “home” (and where is “home”?) during each rotation, every time he needs to get […]