Howdy Trashmii! This week, we tune in for an epic test of endurance. Just how much pain can our little Luis take in the pursuit of pleasure? It turns out a LOT, y’all — let’s take a gander…
We open with Ryan looking over the inspection report, which he calls a novel. “What in the f*ck?” he moans. He gets Ward on the phone. There’s an offer on the way, he says, but first Ward must spend $25,000 for repairs.
Ryan interviews that Ward needs to “suck it up” — it’s been three years, and the house is costing Ward every day to carry it. Plus, $25K is a small amount to spend in order to make $18 million. Ward is pissed and hangs up.
“Ooh… I could just CRUMPLE his head right now!”
“Get me Sebastian on the phone,” he tells a smirking Jordan2.
Bargain-bin, “Slightly Damaged” Jordan
Meanwhile, Luis is in the office, texting a thank you to Howard Lorber when this guy Dennis enters. Dennis is financial advisor and stockbroker to some guy named Ben that Luis is really stoked about. Luis tells us Ben will buy and buy, if you find him opportunities. “This is the kind of guy that will put your grandkids through college!” he says.
Luis explains there’s this hot new building under construction by Howard Lorber, the Fisher Brothers and Steve Witkoff on Murray Street. He says they need to come in next Wednesday for the opportunity to get in early.
Dennis gives him grief, saying he’s booked solid on Wednesday. Luis says he doesn’t understand, he has to be there on Wednesday. Even if he has open heart surgery, he needs to have it at the meeting.
“Nope, no way,” says Dennis.
So the great thing is, Luis got access to come in first, before they opened the sales office. Dennis asks how he managed that, and Luis says he was a persistent little Puerto Rican.
Then he gets all excited, and counts his chickens before they’re hatched, as he is wont to do.
Meanwhile, Fredrik complains to Jordan1 that his office is a mess. Jordan1 says it shows character, but Fredrik says according to his mom, geniuses are the messiest, so he must be a genius.
I’ve seen smarter
Just then, Mona calls. Fredrik remind us that Mona WAS a client of his, until he “quit”. So Mona is coming back with that mutually agreeable offer Fredrik wanted, but with a twist — he has to sell half the building in two weeks to get the twelve units she’s retaining.
Poor Fredrik! He doesn’t think he can do it, but agrees to do his best… what a nail-biter!
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