Heya Trashies!
Its time. Welcome back to Masterchef. Ramsay’s second biggest cash cow drags itself back up from the depths to terrorize our coastal cities once more, like Godzilla. Rawwwrrr!
This season its a beast looking quite a bit different to previous years. No, TG hasn’t lost even more weight, he just isn’t turning up at all. I haven’t found out why, but maybe he got fed up of being referred to as ‘America’s top young chef’ instead of the two michelin star chef he is. Or he got fed up being Ramsay’s comedy extra. Or he feared the show has become hugely repetitive and lackluster. Who knows. The person with the best theory can win a vague sense of approbation from myself and their peers.
This has introduced a format change. Instead of a replacement third judge there will be a new guest judge, each week I think. If this doesn’t fill you with dread, it should, because I fear it will lead to a five to ten minute very dull advert each week for the guest judge, but other than that part it should be fine.
OK, on with the show. First, we have the usual crowd shots of people waving signs and yelling they’re the next Masterchef.
We’ll never see him again
The curse of appearing first I think. Gordy once more plays on his rep.
Whats my other show again?
He handles the voice over intro and sadly we’re getting forty contestants again. This is one of the reasons last years season became eclipsed by the Junior spin off – there’s just too many faces to register leave alone get to know. If this follows last years pattern I’m still going to be saying ‘Who the fuck are you?’ in episode five as faces I’d not seen before pop up and win the mystery box.
First up is a friendly bloke who is a firefighter and also a cook. He appears again later so I won’t bother yet. Also up is a foolish lady who disses her job of fifteen years, saying she hates it. Lots of people hate their job, but most refrain from admitting it on National TV.
Now an Ex-Credit Union Co-ordinator
That has to be a Monday morning meeting no one wants. ‘So, you hate working for me? Don’t worry, I’ve a way to solve your problem.’
I’m not getting attached to anyone yet. The challenge is a signature dish cook off, the winner from each pair going through to the top twenty.
We get a lengthy introduction to Brandy and Samson. Brandy is a Kentucky girl who refuses to count her carbs and therefore is awesome. Sadly she also believes in the ability of anyone to achieve anything if they try hard enough, which is the mantra for stalkers and fantasists the world over. Samson is a ‘Mixologist’. I think that means he’s a bartender with delusions of grandeur. Anyone who is a booze hound can make cocktails mate. On the plus side, he has an impossibly long neck.
See?
Samson wants to show his Kosher family why he isn’t anymore. As an atheist this is largely meaningless to me, but if he’s left the fold for the sake of food I can see how it could be a big deal. I hope he gets his wish. They both ooze confidence and part of me is thinking we’re bound to meet some spuds later who get through and won’t be as good as either of this pair.
They’re both making steaks. Brandy is pan searing her steak in a fairly traditional way, whilst Samson is doing some mad stuff with chocolate, Tarragon and a port reduction. Oddly I know Tarragon and chocolate can work, but add in port and that’s a very rich sauce. Oh and the Pomegranate. Basically a down home solid effort from Brandy versus a much riskier experimental effort from Samson.
Brandy’s steak has a Kentucky Bourbon cream sauce, and a giant parmesan encrusted tomato.
I think this dish needed more tomatoes.
Its medium rare, Gordy likes it, though not her presentation. RoboTosi likes it too.
Samson’s effort is much better presented, but with far less to eat which I don’t like, being greedy.
Has someone already eaten the sprouts?
Roasted parsnip puree, with his mad sauce on it. Gordy likes the sauce, but thinks the flavors are not all present.
Two decent efforts, and Brandy wins. Gordy even says ‘we wish you weren’t in the same battle, you both deserve an apron.’ Lampshading that Samson might get into a last ditch cook off type thing, he deserves to. Just look at how long his neck is. He’s a graceful loser too which is always good to see.
Next up is Andrea, a 21 year old latina of Cuban descent who is instantly annoying. She is up against Taylor, a 28 year old ‘All American’ Texan who is also instantly annoying. We could dump both of these and get Samson back? Please?