You guys, I completely spaced writing up this week’s episode recap! I apologize for the tardiness, the next one I won’t be so late getting up.
So this week, our three couples are still on their honeymoons. One couple is still as awkward around each other as Middle Schoolers at a dance hall, the other couple can’t keep their hands off each other (barf), and our third couple hates each other soooooo much! It’s so bad, and it’s awesome. Because it’s probably the most real thing on reality tv right now. “Hey check out this show where two strangers pretend to be married and not hate each other!” “Will that work?” “Not a chance!” Awesome.
Sonia and Nick:
Sonia and Nick are growing on me, in that they seem like really nice people doing their best in a strange situation. In this episode they talk a little bit about Sonia’s freak out and Nick is very understanding and realizes that Sonia is probably feeling insecure and overreacting a bit. A fact that she attests to her in her interview. See – totally a normal human being thing. Anyway, these two go salsa dancing in order to try to bring some romance and intimacy into the relationship, but mostly it’s just Nick kind of awkwardly marching in place looking terrified to be touching a girl in public. I don’t know if he’s gay as someone here as suggested, or if he’s just painfully shy – but he is not a good dancer. It’s hilarious. They share a little peck at the very loud pushy insistence of the dance instructors.
These two are also funny because apparently they have a bet going. Apparently in each excursion they have been keeping score and whoever wins has to take the other out to dinner. Here I’d like to point out this trip is paid for by the show, but whatever. Do that.
Anyway they go kite surfing and both of them get throttled and it’s awesome. Somehow Nick is the winner. Then they go four wheeling through poverty stricken neighborhoods – yay white privilege! And Nick is again the winner. So, apparently Sonia has to buy him dinner or something. I really have nothing to say about these two. They seem super normal and kind of shy. I don’t see a connection though, so its hard to say if they’ll stay married. I’m gonna say no. Especially when Sonia has to share a house with dogs that terrify her. (Why were they matched?!!!)
Tom and Lillian:
We STILL do not have a van reveal with this couple yet. Which I know is what you all are waiting for. And me, too. At this point, all of his interviews are about his stupid bus and his “lifestyle choice,” which sounds like he’s into something nefarious – not a broke-ass jobless guy living in a broke-down bus. Anyway, these two still can’t keep their hands off each other. Tom speaks with the pastor/counselor who counsels Tom on being honest and forthright. Which Tom hasn’t done yet. I can’t wait till she finds out, but we’re not there yet. Previews show him pulling up to the bus with her int eh car and just springing it on her. Should be amazing!
Heather and Derek:
By far, my favorite couple because they hate each other so so so so very much! I love it. This week, Heather interviews that she wants to start the day on a positive note and try to just get to know Derek. Derek interviews that Heather’s being really fake. Which, true. But would you rather she be a stone cold bitch to your face, Derek? Careful what you wish for. Cuz its about to come true.
So this day they are going to take surfing lessons. Heather seems to take to it rather quickly, and Derek does not a lot of falling off the board. At some point during the surfing lesson, Derek gets jealous/self-righteous/peeved because he sees the surf instructor helping Heather get over some waves by holding her hand. He interviews that Heather won’t hold his hand and show affection, but she’s fine with the surf instructor. Wow. This guy. He sounds like a real jerk, here and honestly – I wouldn’t want him to touch me, either.
The nerve! Look at them carrying on!
After the surfing lesson, they somehow manage to drag Derek’s ego out of the ocean and make it over to some caves. The two of them climb down the ladder into the beachside caves and Derek is a bit scared of heights. They share a nice moment and then Heather just turns and climbs up the ladder to get out. Derek immediately starts bitching to the camera about how Heather “abandoned” him, and how she’s ice cold (true) and rude (also, true). But here, he just gets way out of line.